Designing Your Life: Defining Success
What is your definition of success? Is it living in a big beautiful house, driving a Lexus or an Expedition? Is it having money in the bank and investments? Perhaps, success for you is having good health and the ability to garden with your children or work in the garden. We all have our own definition of success.
However, when was the last time you really thought about what being successful means to you? We have all heard that “thoughts are things.” It is imperative that we clarify our definition. If I’m not directing my future, who is? Don’t make fun of me and say, “God.” We are given free will. What are you doing with that free will?
What motivates you? What wakes you up in the middle of the night? What is more important? money, family, fitness, spirituality? In what order would you place such concepts? Those are just a few items that may be on the list. For most of us, it’s easy to prioritize them.
Expand the list. Let’s add concepts like mental health, happiness, physical appearance, sex, popularity, companionship, and anything else that can contribute to your definition of success. Make a list. Then prioritize that list.
Is it more important to be debt free with unlimited cash flow or to have a healthy and loving family? I hope it was easy to answer. Let’s consider something more difficult, true love vs. fellowship. Then take that priority and compare it to sex. If you could only choose one, would it be great sex or true love? Create a specific list of priorities to challenge and create your ultimate definition of success.
If you’re dating, create a list together and prioritize them separately. Comparing your lists could be an eye-opening experience. I should have gotten out of a previous relationship by the time I saw items like physical appearance, sex, and money in the top five on your list. Now of course if you are married you need to create and prioritize this list together.
Can you have it all? If you saw the 1997 Warner Brother movie Devil’s Advocate, starring Al Pacino and Keanu Reeves, you would surely say, “No!” Keanu’s character almost changed the life of his beloved wife because of her career. It is not an overnight exchange. The process speeds up so gradually that you don’t see it happening.
You are paying attention? By knowing your definition of success, knowing the potential trade-offs, knowing the danger signs for other priorities, knowing the requirements and rewards, you can design the most satisfying and desirable life. Yes, I believe that one can have it all.
Do not wait. Start now.