The paradox of happiness

“Everything that is best for us comes by itself into our hands, but if we strive to overcome it, it perpetually eludes us.”

-Ananda Coomaraswamy

WAS THERE EVER such an important goal in life as Happiness? Everybody wants it. Happiness, contentment, contentment, fulfillment… whatever you call it, it commands us to sit up and take notice, otherwise we will become miserable. The concept is ingrained in Western culture. The term ‘happily ever after’ is the idealistic life we ​​all strive for, although we know full well that it is only applicable in fairy tales where all Works Out The truth is, we all want life to be joyous and fulfilling. We would be less than human if this were not so. But, here’s a warning: happiness is elusive!

It seems like a contradiction in terms that happiness is elusive. It should be simple, but I suspect that each of us identifies deep within us a need for satisfaction that is never satisfied. We can achieve happiness for a day, a week, a month, a year. But it never lasts.

Looking at our “buy now, pay later” culture, there are many people who spend their entire lives (and all the money they make, and some they don’t!) simply trying to “be” happy or trying to achieve happiness. The truth: happiness is elusive; fighting for it, we often deny it. As the proverb says, being happy is like holding oil in your hand: it is impossible to contain.

It’s not wrong to want happiness, but it’s wrong to seek it in a way that doesn’t take into account other important factors in life. This is the trap. Happiness should be the by-product (which comes as a result of what we do) not the main product (the reason for doing something itself). The process is more important than the result. This explains the quote at the beginning. Strive for happiness and it perpetually eludes us. We need to almost forget it to achieve it.

holocaust survivor and psychiatrist victor frankl He also said: “To the extent that one makes happiness the goal of his motivation, he necessarily makes it the object of his attention. lose sight of reason for happiness, and happiness itself must vanish.”

Seen as a process, we have happiness as a high goal: “the goal”, which means that great emphasis is placed on it; this in effect negates the reason for happiness, and happiness fades away. Has to. This truth pays homage to the fact that we often get what we give. Strive instead for the right, good, just, and true things, simply because it is right, and happiness must come, eventually. Once again, Viktor Frankl said:

“Success and happiness must happen, the less one cares about them, the more they can.”

Happiness defined in the typical way of the world seems to be tied to the achievement of an objective or a goal like, ‘if I achieve this, I will be happy and content’. Most of us know, subconsciously at least, that it rarely, if ever, works this way. We are happy for a while with the new acquisition or “toy”, but soon the novelty wears off. This is the wrong path to happiness. He puts happiness as his goal, and despises the path, the half to get there.

Happiness has been formulated like this: Happiness = K (Knowing who you are) + D (Discovering your life’s work) + L (Learning not to tolerate what is not important). That is the formula of happiness: know yourself, [know] your true calling, and that you get what you tolerate (that is, we should only tolerate what is important and leads us towards the goal, for example, not tolerate bad habits that prevent you from reaching a goal). (See reference 1)

To know about us requires a deep spiritual path. It cannot be achieved any other way. There is no depth to be plumbed here. Each one of us is radically and deeply molded from within. We can never come close to being truly happy unless we become spiritual, acknowledging our innate spirituality. A word of warning though: there are many crooked paths to this goal; Be wise and choose the right path! You need not find yourself further from the goal than ever. This is the devil’s goal: to confuse his spirituality.

Discovering your life’s work itself is fascinating. How many teens get so stressed out (along with their parents) trying to find the “right career path”? As we know? We don’t know what we don’t know. Without having tried some things we will have no hope of In fact knowledge. However, some in fact “just know”, and seem to have always known, what they have been “called” to do.

I believe what the renowned psychologist, martin seligman saying. What we have to change is the emphasis. Instead of focusing on our feelings, we should work positively on those things that naturally stimulate and drive us; each of us is “called” to a certain job. “Working” in this way is a blessing; in fact, we cannot be truly satisfied without having worked for it.

It’s also about appreciating the moment. Happiness said Benjamin Franklin,

“It is produced not so much by the great fortunes that seldom happen as by the small advantages that occur every day.”

Seligman has been written again… It’s about overcoming our obsessive concern with how we feel. He says: “The time has come for a science that seeks to understand positive emotions, develop strength and virtue, and provide guides to finding what Aristotle called the ‘good life’.”

Now that we have considered the first two, we need the courage to identify and correct those things that hinder the process of achieving them, essentially involving these two. What do we simply tolerate that we shouldn’t? Every person of real importance in the world has faced and conquered this challenge. However, the challenge remains: it is a dynamic process that lasts throughout our lives.

What will it be then to summarize? First of all, don’t be tempted to shorten the process of happiness. I believe Christ spoke words to the effect of “seek first God and his ways, and all these (worldly) things shall be added unto you.” We have to do things because they are right and then the right things will happen to us.

We all have incredible meaning, potentially. Perhaps the key to happiness is in achieving the life you can to have: an investment in knowing ourselves, our life’s work, and making sure nothing unimportant gets in the way.

Which is your destination? Your happiness is probably related to that.

Copyright 2007 Steve Wickham.

Reference 1: [http://home.att.net/~signatureseries/happiness.htm]