A couples guide to making a swingers profile
Your profile represents you to potential fellow players. Before a single or couple sends you a message or before they reply to a message sent by you, they will most likely see your profile.
Images
Images are extremely important in profiles. It is what is initially attracting people to see your profile.
If you hope to be successful in meeting other sexual partners online, you MUST post photos on your profile. Many couples fear that someone in their public life will recognize them. If that’s the case, you may be in the wrong lifestyle.
Many services allow you to have public photos and private photos.
We have found that some people choose to post public photos without blocked faces and other people, like us, block our faces in our public photos. We personally choose to block our eyes, however whether you choose to block just the eyes or the whole face or not to block at all is a personal choice. What’s important is that whoever is viewing your profile can get a good idea of what you look like and whether the two of you are an eye-catching couple.
In both public and private photos, you must have at least one CLEAR photo of BOTH of you together.
This photo doesn’t have to be the main photo and probably shouldn’t be.
We recommend taking a trip to some porn websites and looking at the photos that are used as album covers and also looking at those adult friend finder type ads that appear with photos of the supposedly single woman who wants to meet you.
Usually it is the male half of the Couple that does most of the online work of figuring out which Couples to message. So, try to find out which photos your male half finds attractive and would like to click on and try to replicate them in your own private photo session and use one of those photos as the main photo to attract people to view your profile.
Understand that too many profiles contain only the female half of the couple period. DO NOT fall into this trap.
Remember that most of the time you will be swapping partners with another partner and female to male attraction is just as important as male to female attraction. Let people preview what they’re getting before they commit to further communication with you, which only makes it more awkward to say no thanks once they finally see your male half.
Also, separate photos of the man and woman, but no photos of them together, scream a fake profile.
Fascinated
Nobody likes an ambiguous profile or without content. It’s always a hassle to have to ask about certain preferences. We are going to keep this extremely simple. For best results, be VERY clear on the following:
1. Indicate what you are looking for. FMMF, FMMF, FMMF, etc.
2. Indicate if you are: Soft-Swap or Full-Swap
3. Indicate if you play: only in the same room or with separate rooms
4. Indicate if your female half is: bisexual, bicurious or heterosexual
5. Indicate if you are drug and disease free (if you have NOT been tested in the last 6 months, in all honesty you have no idea if you are disease free or not, so don’t lie)
6. Indicate if you can host
7. Indicate if you can travel
8. Indicate if you play bareback or practice safe sex
9. If you are asked to indicate a weight, BE SURE TO INDICATE IT and do not lie. Some of you may be wondering why this is important. If a guy looks at your profile and sees that flashy “0,” he’ll think you’re seriously overweight. People often equate being overweight with being unattractive. Simply indicate your weight. Most men have no idea how much a woman should weigh anyway and just look at photos, but a “0” is just a big red flag.
10. Please indicate your actual age. Basically, each service requires you to indicate your age. Be honest about it. If someone viewing your profile can say that there is absolutely no way you can be 35 years old and you are actually 50, they will start to wonder what else you are being dishonest about. Just be honest.
Aside from the above, additional information you might want to include is:
1. A brief description about the two of you (how long have you been together, why did you join the lifestyle, what do you like about the lifestyle, are you athletic, etc.)
2. Please list anything you are not interested in (eg single men)
3. Age preferences, limits or ranges.
4. Physical preferences or requirements (penis size, ethnic requirements, athleticism, etc.)
5. General limitations or requirements (how you plan to exchange images, need for voice verification before meeting, all first meetings are just meet and greet with no expectations, etc.)
If you address each of the twelve items listed above, your profile should be very detailed and allow anyone who views your profile to have a very good understanding of what you are looking for and what you are not looking for.
Certifications/Validations
Most online services have some kind of certification/validation system where people you meet can certify that you are “real”.
In all the services we use we have certifications. Of some of them we have a significant amount. The simple truth is that if you have ZERO certifications, that will be a red flag to many, ESPECIALLY if you have been a member of the online service you are with for over a year. The question that will go through the mind of the other person(s) is, “what happens to them that they don’t have certifications after a year of supposedly swinging?”. Lifestyle experience has also shown us that most profiles containing zero certifications are fake.
This means it’s in your best interest to certify those you know, even if you don’t play with them. You will usually receive certifications in return. It will give you legitimacy and indicate to those who view your profile that you are a real couple and ease some of the tension that comes with dealing with someone new online.
However, keep in mind that too many certifications can have a negative impact. If you have a very high number (what is considered high will be different for different people), a partner viewing your profile may interpret that you will sleep with anyone and this will put you off. We personally don’t care. We feel like our certifications speak for themselves and in fact we play a lot and if that’s not for the other couple viewing our profile we respect that.
We have met other couples who do not accept more certifications above a certain number and others who accept new ones but delete an old one for each new one they obtain to keep the number within a certain limit. We’ve also come across couples who believe it’s nobody’s business who they sleep with and don’t give or receive certifications. We believe that as a result they are just making meeting Couples a little more difficult than it has to be and we do not encourage refraining from certifying and receiving certifications.
Paid or Unpaid
Free and trial memberships come with restrictions and also a stigma. Typically, lifestyle services offer “lifetime memberships” for a couple of hundred dollars. If you are serious about meeting other couples, just pay the membership fee. Free members yell “not serious” to everyone who reads their profile. Since membership is so cheap, many who look at those profiles will think that if they were serious, they would be paid members. Additionally, many services allow members to block trial and free members, which, as a free member, would limit the number of partners you can interact with. We recommend purchasing a membership. It’s just another indication that they are a serious couple.
Headline
Many services allow you to place a small headline or banner ad at the top of your profile. Many times, other than your main photo, this is all they’ll see. We suggest you review the different profiles that attracted you on online services and the type of headlines they had and use a headline that briefly describes you in a positive light or what you are looking for.
conclusion
Sure you can skimp on making an impressive profile, but it will be to your detriment. We believe in simplifying life and having a wonderful profile just makes it that much easier to attract couples or singles (if that’s your preference). Do yourself a favor and spend time with your loved ones, you won’t regret it.